Second Meditation for the Fifth Week of Lent

Of the most arresting words in the Holy Gospels, non can compare with a terse sentence in St. John’s Gospel. It is his 13th chapter. Our Lord has told Judas to go, and do what he wants to do quickly. Judas leaves the Upper Room, and the evangelist writes the terrifying line: “and it was night”. 

St. John was not recording the time of day. He was describing the reign of sin. Night is mentioned one other time as an existential moment. It was also in St. John’s Gospel, when he writes of Nicodemus that he came to Jesus at night, for fear of the Jews. Night was vastly different in these two sentences. For Judas, the night is the moment where sin swallows him whole; for Nicodemus, the night is illuminated by the light of the Savior.

It is a trick of the devil to think ourselves very different than Judas. He was in the company of Our Lord for three years. We, too, are often in the company of Our Lord through grace. Our Lord entrusted many important duties to Judas, chief of which was keeper of the purse. To us as well Our Lord has committed our vocation in life. Yet, at a moment, ever wrapped in mystery, Judas made a free choice to betray Our Lord. In spite of Judas’ closeness to Our Savior, still his decision is made. We, too, persist in our sins; slowness to amend our lives; stubbornness in Augustine’s evocative words, “We have come to love our poison”. How many years of our life have we already squandered by coasting upon the graces Our Savior lavishes upon us? When He asks love in return, we throw Him scraps. We must face the truth: Each day comes closer to the razor’s edge in resembling Judas. No wonder St. Philip Neri prayed daily: “O My Lord, beware of Philip today, lest He betray you!”

Remember that Judas sealed his betrayal with – a kiss. How Our Lord’s heart must have broken, as He responded: “Thou wouldst betray the Son of Man with a kiss?” A betrayal is always preceded by a friendship, a binding of love. We are not betrayed by enemies. Each of our sins is a kiss to the Savior. As crushing a kiss as was Judas’. If our hearts have not been hardened beyond repair, we too hear Our Savior’s lament: “Wouldst thou betray the Savior Who loves you with a kiss?”